365 Manners Kids Should Know:

When your child recieves duplicate gifts
sweater isn’t your child style, the video is one he already has, or
the seashell clock is simply ugly. Unless the giver lets your child
know the sweater or video can be returned or exchanged (and even
then caution is urged), the best response is a sincere thank you.”
Tell your child to focus on the giver, not the gift. The giver put
time and thought into its selection, and certainly meant to please
your child.
There is no need for your child to lie when writing the note by
saying, for instance, that the dancing chihuahua was just what he
wanted. It would he better to say. Thank you for remembering
my birthday you have a talent for finding one—and-only gifts. I
will always think of you when I see the dancing chihuahua.”
Encourage your child to be creative and sincere and have fun
with dificult thank-you notes.
365 Manners Kids Should Know:
Games, Activities, and Other Fun Ways to Help Children Learn Etiquette

Manners & Etiquette

OCTOBER 15
“No gifts”
When an invitation says ‘no gifts,’ guests should honor the
request. On occasion a child will be invited to a “no gifts birth
day party, although children do love to get gills, so this is rare.
Such a patty may be planned if a child has birthday parties several years in row while his friends have them less frequently.
His parents may want to entertain his friends but don’t want
them to feel obligated to purchase a gilt every year. As with par
ties for adults, children should take the recommendation at face
value. They don’t have an obligation to take a gift. However, if
your child’s best friend is having such a party and your child has
already picked out the perfect gift, have her give it to her mend
when they arc alone.
No gifts’ should not he understood to mean "give money.’
Excerpt from 365 Manners Kids Should Know: Games, Activities, and Other Fun Ways to Help By Sheryl Eberly

365 Manners Kids Should Know

Giving gifts at home

Choosing the right gift is a wonderful expression of affection or
appreciation. but it’s a skill that can take time lo develop. Children can learn by watching your example or by getting practice
at home.
Gift giving doesn’t come without its pitfalls—sometimes the
wrong gift is chosen, too many gifts are given that aren’t reciprocated, or appreciation isn’t shown when a gift is received.
Don’t lei your child miss the birthdays of family members.
Elementary-school children will need to be reminded of approach
Continued

365 Manners Kids Should Know

Giving and Getting
OCTOBER 11
Gifts
Children love to get gifts—so much so that they may break a fundamental rule of good manners and ask for them. Their early gilt
giving birthday gifts to friends) is sometimes done with a hint of
reluctance, How they wish they could just keep the gift them.
selves! Or you might find yourself buying duplicate items—one
[or your child to give away and one for him to keep.
As your child gets older, getting and giving gifts will take on
more meaning. ¡kil begin to realize that he should give gifts in a
similar price range as hîs friends: he shouldn’t outspend others.
Nor should he ever feel obligated to buy a gift that hurts your
íamily budget. Ii’s more thoughtful to buy a gift that reflects the
interests of the other person than to spend a lot of money
Guts are given lo mark special occasions—birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, Valentine’s Day—or they may be given just as
a token of friendship and love. A girl may bring her mend some
beautiful shells when she returns home from a beach vacation, A
boy can oiler his buddy .in enlarged and framed snapshot of the
two of them. These gills should always be given out of sincere
affection and regard for the other person.
Your child should never use a gilt to try to influence another
person. For example, one elementary-school girl craved the
Friendship of another girl in her class and repeatedly gave many
gifts—money candy desserts—trying to bribe the other girl into
friendship. She didn’t understand that you cant buy friendship.
The child who received the gifts felt torn inside. Of course she
liked getting gifts, but she didn’t like the obligation she began to
feel. Help your child understand that it isn’t truly a gift if the
other person doesn't feel good about it.